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Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: beagledave
Date: September 23, 2014 01:57PM
[www.mommyish.com]

Pretty much safe for work...I guess?

[Mom] comes into the classroom with a pan full of treats and brings them to me and says with a smile “I decided you can use these to teach the kids about the woman’s @#$%& today”. Baffled and completely caught off guard I slowly peel the aluminum foil off the pan to behold a plethora of sugar cookie and frosting @#$%&. Not just any old @#$%&, but ALL KINDS OF @#$%&… I give the parent the most professional look I can muster and quietly reply “I’m sorry Autumn, but I can’t give these to my students. This just isn’t appropriate.”

It gets worse.

Apparently the "V" word, even the shortened version, is nanny blocked.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/23/2014 01:59PM by beagledave.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: cbelt3
Date: September 23, 2014 02:01PM
Some folk don't understand that adult reproductive militancy has no place in the elementary school classroom.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: Paul F.
Date: September 23, 2014 02:06PM
If one wants their 2nd grader to know all about vajayjays, then you are MOST WELCOME to teach your second grader about them at home. In fact, if it's OK with your kids friends parents, organize a study group.
But an elementary classroom at cookie time is not the time, or the place.



Paul F.
-----
A sword never kills anybody; it is a tool in the killer's hand. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca c. 5 BC - 65 AD
----
Good is the enemy of Excellent. Talent is not necessary for Excellence.
Persistence is necessary for Excellence. And Persistence is a Decision.

--

--

--
Eureka, CA
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: RAMd®d
Date: September 23, 2014 02:10PM
"I still wouldn’t bake a plate of @#$%& cookies and bring them to my grade-schooler’s class, because I’m not b@t-s**t crazy."

I love that line!

I really do want to like the frosting off those cookies.




When a good man is hurt,
all who would be called good
must suffer with him.

Everybody matters or nobody matters.

You and I have memories longer than the road that stretches out ahead.

There is no safety for honest men except
by believing all possible evil of evil men.

We don’t do focus groups. They just ensure that you don’t offend anyone, and produce bland inoffensive products. —Sir Jonathan Ive

-An armed society is a polite society.
And hope is a lousy defense.

You make me pull, I'll put you down.

Mister, that's a ten-gallon hat on a twenty-gallon head.

I *love* SIGs. It's Glocks I hate.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: fauch
Date: September 23, 2014 02:14PM
This is definitely NSFW, skip to 3:00 if you must.....

[www.youtube.com]
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Also…
Posted by: RAMd®d
Date: September 23, 2014 02:16PM
For better or worse, en masse homemade goods have been prohibited from most of the schools around me, for years.

The mon's name was Autumn?




When a good man is hurt,
all who would be called good
must suffer with him.

Everybody matters or nobody matters.

You and I have memories longer than the road that stretches out ahead.

There is no safety for honest men except
by believing all possible evil of evil men.

We don’t do focus groups. They just ensure that you don’t offend anyone, and produce bland inoffensive products. —Sir Jonathan Ive

-An armed society is a polite society.
And hope is a lousy defense.

You make me pull, I'll put you down.

Mister, that's a ten-gallon hat on a twenty-gallon head.

I *love* SIGs. It's Glocks I hate.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: Black
Date: September 23, 2014 02:25PM
this_thread_is_useless_without_pics




New forum user map 8/2015: [www.zeemaps.com]
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: beagledave
Date: September 23, 2014 02:29PM
Pro tip:

Brazilian cookies require less sprinkles.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: Gutenberg
Date: September 23, 2014 02:30PM
FAKE. This is another Internet hoax. The story is completely devoid of detail.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: eustacetilley
Date: September 23, 2014 02:30PM
Some of the accompanying images are very funny.
Probably not postable here, but very funny nonetheless.
A couple of those linked vaginas are a little disturbing, like the leering vagina dentata, [cdn2.mommyish.com], and the "Mother Of God", complete with piercing. [a.disquscdn.com]

Eustace
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: Black
Date: September 23, 2014 02:37PM
Quote
Gutenberg
FAKE. This is another Internet hoax. The story is completely devoid of detail.
Really? Even though there's no mention of the mother taking a selfie with a cookie?




New forum user map 8/2015: [www.zeemaps.com]
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: GGD
Date: September 23, 2014 03:09PM
So, what's the recipe and ingredients?

How many @#$%& are needed per batch?
Any suggestions on where to obtain them?
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: Speedy
Date: September 23, 2014 03:12PM
If I were the teacher I would have accepted them and distributed them to the kids as flower cookies. Just to see what 'Autumn' would bring next time.



Saint Cloud, Minnesota, where the weather is wonderful even when it isn't.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: eustacetilley
Date: September 23, 2014 03:25PM
Quote
GGD
So, what's the recipe and ingredients?

How many @#$%& are needed per batch?
Any suggestions on where to obtain them?

I was going to make a "Are they made with real..." joke when I realized that this could all go back to "What Little Girls Are Made Of", and Kirk's reaction:

Eustace
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: freeradical
Date: September 23, 2014 03:26PM
Washington Monument


It couldn't be erected today...
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Re: Also…
Posted by: TLB
Date: September 23, 2014 03:48PM
Quote
RAMd®d
For better or worse, en masse homemade goods have been prohibited from most of the schools around me, for years.

Yep, around here the discussion would never get to what the cookies depicted, the mother would be severely chastised and asked to leave for just bringing sugar and potential peanut contamination into the building.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: Mini 9
Date: September 23, 2014 03:57PM
i would suspect some people over history of the world, lived and died without ever needing ot know what a V looked like. Not a bad thing, in some respect.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: Lew Zealand
Date: September 23, 2014 04:40PM
VJJ

just curious about the filter.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: Filliam H. Muffman
Date: September 23, 2014 04:53PM
A selfie with one of the cookies is necessary to prove that she didn't Photoshop the frosting.



In tha 360. MRF User Map
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: $tevie
Date: September 23, 2014 04:58PM
If there's one thing that gets my goat, it's the fact that nobody in this country seems to know what a @#$%& is. It's unbelievable.



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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: Steve G.
Date: September 23, 2014 05:02PM
Can't imagine why anyone would think this is a hoax...
Did you get this in an email from Mom?
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: TheTominator
Date: September 23, 2014 05:14PM
Quote
$tevie
If there's one thing that gets my goat, it's the fact that nobody in this country seems to know what a @#$%& is. It's unbelievable.

Sure we do. After all, I'm sure we all know our geography.

It's nickname is "Mother of Presidents".

There's even a West one formed during the Civil War.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: mattkime
Date: September 23, 2014 05:38PM
its my guess that children could handle this better than adults



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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: hal
Date: September 23, 2014 06:14PM
My little niece learned all about this stuff before kindergarten. She watched her own birth video over and over. Listening to her pronouncing 'fallopian tubes' oh so seriously was an absolute riot. She has no scars whatsoever from this stuff...

Frankly, I think second grade is just fine to talk about this stuff, but I'm not gonna try to force anyone to agree.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: eustacetilley
Date: September 23, 2014 06:35PM
Quote
hal
My little niece learned all about this stuff before kindergarten. She watched her own birth video over and over. Listening to her pronouncing 'fallopian tubes' oh so seriously was an absolute riot. She has no scars whatsoever from this stuff...

Frankly, I think second grade is just fine to talk about this stuff, but I'm not gonna try to force anyone to agree.

[www.youtube.com]

Eustace
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: ztirffritz
Date: September 23, 2014 07:06PM
It's a fine line trying to teach a child these things and make them understand the social expectations regarding when/where you can talk about them. You don't want make it a shameful dirty thing, but you do want to make them understand that it is a private thing. You want to answer questions but you also know that it is like a loaded gun in the hands of a child. Eventually the phrase "Guess where my daddy stuck his blank in my mamma?" will be uttered at the most awkward moment possible. Nonetheless, I'm finding sex talks to be easier than explaining violence and weapons. As an example, I LOVE Star Wars and I probably watched it for the first time when I was 5. Part of me says "I turned out fine, so my son should be able to handle this..." another part of me says "HOLY CRAP this is a violent movie. Han shot first, that guy's arm was cut off just for touching Luke, the Storm Troopers massacred the Jawas, the Jedi were exterminated in a genocidal campaign...I can't let a 5 year old watch this!"



**************************************
MacResource User Map: [www.zeemaps.com]#
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: beagledave
Date: September 23, 2014 07:54PM
Snopes is on it..and apprently they seem dubious.

[www.snopes.com]

However, given the "friend of a friend" telling and the outrageous behavior described on the part of the parent involved, it's entirely possible that the tale is either exaggerated or wholly fabricated.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: Paul F.
Date: September 23, 2014 08:11PM
Quote
hal
Frankly, I think second grade is just fine to talk about this stuff, but I'm not gonna try to force anyone to agree.

Don't disagree with you there...
But it's not the SCHOOLS place to talk about it with them, it's the parents.



Paul F.
-----
A sword never kills anybody; it is a tool in the killer's hand. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca c. 5 BC - 65 AD
----
Good is the enemy of Excellent. Talent is not necessary for Excellence.
Persistence is necessary for Excellence. And Persistence is a Decision.

--

--

--
Eureka, CA
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: Black
Date: September 23, 2014 08:22PM
Still no info on what flavor they are?




New forum user map 8/2015: [www.zeemaps.com]
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: decay
Date: September 23, 2014 10:27PM
A little girl goes to the barbershop with her father. She stands next to the barber chair, as her father gets his hair cut, eating a cookie.

The barber says to her, "Sweetheart, you're going to get hair on your cookie."

She says, "Yes I know, and I'm gonna get @#$%&, too."




---
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: Black
Date: September 23, 2014 11:26PM
I think I found the recipe!

Step 1: Preheat oven to 375°. Beat @#$%& with sugar in large bowl with electric mixer until light and fluffy, about 3 minutes. Beat in @#$%& and @#$%&, scraping sides occasionally, until blended. Beat in @#$%&, baking powder and salt.

Step 2: Shape dough into @#$%& of about 2 tablespoons. Arrange 3 inches apart on ungreased baking sheets. Press balls into 2-1/2-inch @#$%&. Pinch bottom to form the point of a @#$%& Push dough at the top of the circle down towards the center, then press dough into a @#$%& shape.

Step 3: Bake 14 minutes or until edges are golden. Cool 2 minutes on wire rack; remove from sheets and cool completely. Decorate if desired*.




New forum user map 8/2015: [www.zeemaps.com]
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: rz
Date: September 24, 2014 08:50AM
Quote
ztirffritz
It's a fine line trying to teach a child these things and make them understand the social expectations regarding when/where you can talk about them. You don't want make it a shameful dirty thing, but you do want to make them understand that it is a private thing. You want to answer questions but you also know that it is like a loaded gun in the hands of a child. Eventually the phrase "Guess where my daddy stuck his blank in my mamma?" will be uttered at the most awkward moment possible. Nonetheless, I'm finding sex talks to be easier than explaining violence and weapons. As an example, I LOVE Star Wars and I probably watched it for the first time when I was 5. Part of me says "I turned out fine, so my son should be able to handle this..." another part of me says "HOLY CRAP this is a violent movie. Han shot first, that guy's arm was cut off just for touching Luke, the Storm Troopers massacred the Jawas, the Jedi were exterminated in a genocidal campaign...I can't let a 5 year old watch this!"

I can relate. My 6 year old son knows the proper term for what he's got. He also knows it's not considered polite to talk about it to others. As far as I know, though, he doesn't know much about the V. He knows girls/women don't have what he has, but he hasn't asked for any more detail.

And I agree about Star Wars. He's soooooo into Star Wars right now, but we haven't let him see the movie yet. I watched it not too long ago, and felt that certain scenes, like the charred and still-smoking remains of Luke's aunt and uncle, were not appropriate for him.
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: decay
Date: September 24, 2014 10:23AM
[www.snopes.com]

Quote

The original post on Reddit's TIFU did not specify a district or even a state in which the cookie controversy might have occurred, which isn't out of the realm of expectation when elementary school classroom issues are at hand. However, given the "friend of a friend" telling and the outrageous behavior described on the part of the parent involved, it's entirely possible that the tale is either exaggerated or wholly fabricated.



---
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: Black
Date: September 24, 2014 10:22PM
I have a new item on my list of "things I never want to google image search again."



New forum user map 8/2015: [www.zeemaps.com]
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Re: Mom bakes @#$%& cookies for 2nd graders....
Posted by: eustacetilley
Date: September 25, 2014 02:21AM
Quote
Black
I have a new item on my list of "things I never want to google image search again."

It could be worse:


Eustace
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