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Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: Monster
Date: March 31, 2006 12:48PM
Mother-fsck a b*tch,
I changed pants earlier, than had to help Monster Son with something, forgot to put all my stuff from one to the other, took my son to school, as I was getting in the car I realized that all my pockets were sans stuff.
Hmmm what are my options here, call the fire dept., see if my neighbors ladders are unlocked so that I may climb up to an open ladder (naah, there's nobody here to film it for Americas Funniest...), or walk my son to school, then walk to the Middle School to get my daughters keys.

Guess what I did, oh okay I'll tell ya', I got my daughters keys, she said "you're such an idiot", more than once, and then I walked home.
Of course I had to stop by a local bar for a drink on the way back home, good thing I can run a tab, finally made it home.
Now I have to get in the car and go buy a blow up doll, not for me, for the lady of honor at a birthday party tonight.






The Taoist Zhuangzi said, "Good order results spontaneously when things are let alone".
The sociologist, and historian, Adam Ferguson described the phenomenon of spontaneous order in society as the "result of human action, but not the execution of any human design".



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/31/2006 12:49PM by Monster.
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: SteveJobs
Date: March 31, 2006 12:51PM
I have not used a key to enter my house in about 12 years. All electronic.



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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: Monster
Date: March 31, 2006 12:52PM
Oh yeah, finally bought a newish Mac (first one in years), picked up one of those refurbed 2.1 GHz iMacs in the refurb section, still haven't set it up though, the wife is not happy, heh-heh, she'll get over it.





The Taoist Zhuangzi said, "Good order results spontaneously when things are let alone".
The sociologist, and historian, Adam Ferguson described the phenomenon of spontaneous order in society as the "result of human action, but not the execution of any human design".
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: SteveJobs
Date: March 31, 2006 12:53PM
Actually, most hard core coders use HEX not binary.

Have a sign up that says

WELCOME TO HEX! (pun on HELL)





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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: Donkey Hotay
Date: March 31, 2006 01:06PM
> Now I have to get in the car and go buy a blow up doll, not for me, for the lady of honor at a birthday party tonight.

Make sure it's the "Otto Pilot" model! ;)
[www.imdb.com]



=DH
Donkey (Ye Olde Farte of ye Internette) Hotay is a Tilted Windmill® enterprise.
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: spacescape
Date: March 31, 2006 01:09PM
Hee hee... sorry to laugh by my son was happily playing on the floor the other day and my wife went outside for about 5-10 seconds to toss some bread out to the birds... Well guess who locked my wife out??? Mr. Speedy Crawler (our 11 month old son)... OPPS... No house key... no car key to get into the garage to get the hidden key... code to garage wasn't working... YIKES... She was in a panic for a minute or two... Luckily my mom and sister came over ASAP to unlock the doors and the neighbor lady's kept him busy by making faces in the window while she called them...

He thought it was fun and funny...

Must be one of those weeks... Well, go play w/ your mac...

Bill
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: $tevie
Date: March 31, 2006 01:30PM
One advantage to living in the city: we swap keys with friends, so there is always somebody fairly nearby with a set. Added bonus: we keep a key at our neighborhood bar. If we get locked out we can stroll down the street, have a beer, and borrow the spare key.
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: Monster
Date: March 31, 2006 01:39PM
I think it's time for me to hide a key





The Taoist Zhuangzi said, "Good order results spontaneously when things are let alone".
The sociologist, and historian, Adam Ferguson described the phenomenon of spontaneous order in society as the "result of human action, but not the execution of any human design".
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: Jimmypoo
Date: March 31, 2006 01:42PM
a new Mac and Mommy doesn't like it?


Probably going to be a while before you get "hugged." You might
want to pick up an extra doll of the opposite sex.
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: Lux Interior
Date: March 31, 2006 01:47PM
SteveJobs Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I have not used a key to enter my house in about
> 12 years. All electronic.

I haven't used a key to get into your house, either.




;)
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: Seacrest
Date: March 31, 2006 01:52PM
Who is Butch, and what does his son have to do with you locking yourself out of the house?
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: Z
Date: March 31, 2006 01:58PM
Yeah, well, my last weekend was on par.

Drove four hours south to a friend's cabin in Homer, Alaska. We get there after dark, and the cabin is about 12 miles out of town. Eventually, after hiking a hundred yards in the snow that is up to our knees (still have some up here in AK), we find the cabin. Get inside and put our stuff down, decide to walk the dogs a bit and go to the outhouse. On our return, we find the cabin is locked, keys conveniently inside. Girlfriend can't remember where she was told the spare key was. The car is locked. It's starting to snow. Needless to say, we hunt for the key. And then we start to evaluate which window to break while trying to pick the lock on the door with a rake-tine.

Out of options, gf and dogs starting to get cold, I hike back to the car. Thankfully, one door is unlocked. I grab a few tools to try to further pick the lock. When I get back, gf says that her phone was in the car and she found the paper with the owner's telephone number on it. Back and forth to the car one more time, thankfully with phone reception, we find the key and get inside.


I won't even talk about getting the car stuck the next day...


That said, the eagles were beautiful and the beer was good, so all was not lost.




Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/31/2006 01:59PM by Z.
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: PeterB
Date: March 31, 2006 02:00PM
In future, you might consider getting one of these: [www.keyosk.co.uk]




Freya says, 'Hello from NOLA, baby!' (Laissez bon temps rouler!)
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: trisho.
Date: March 31, 2006 02:01PM
$tevie Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> One advantage to living in the city: we swap keys
> with friends, so there is always somebody fairly
> nearby with a set. Added bonus: we keep a key at
> our neighborhood bar. If we get locked out we can
> stroll down the street, have a beer, and borrow
> the spare key.

That bar dealie is such a good idea. Except I'm a regular at a bar in Manhattan and I live in Brooklyn. But still, it's worth the effort.
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: 3d
Date: March 31, 2006 02:11PM
As a NewYorker, I LOVE researching about locks for my apartment smiling smiley

This one guy (who lived in ghettotown) showed me his apartment key. It was crazy looking. Like a dungeon cell block key. It had FOUR rows of "teeth" in an "H" shape. I think he told me it was made by a French company. Not sure. It was a while ago when i saw it. I'd love to find out the name of it. So i can add ANOTHER lock to my door smiling smiley

*EDIT*
Good ol' Google and eBay. It's a Fichet lock.
[cgi.ebay.com]



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/31/2006 02:22PM by 3d.
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: b-bender
Date: March 31, 2006 03:57PM
We never lock our door. But I'm not telling you where we live.
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: elmo3
Date: March 31, 2006 06:34PM
SteveJobs Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I have not used a key to enter my house in about
> 12 years. All electronic.

Just like your women.



---------------


In the words of DharmaDog: "it may or may not be utter horse@#$%&, but it shouldn't be dismissed simply because it doesn't agree with your opinion."

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Trying is the first step to failure. -- Homer Simpson
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: The UnDoug
Date: March 31, 2006 10:07PM
Z, that's an amazing photo of the eagles!
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: decocritter
Date: March 31, 2006 11:11PM
do those fake rocks fool anyone?


I locked myself out of my condo by having my keys (car and all) left in a major department store at the cash register. I realized it the minute I walked down the mall towards my car - but too late - the store had closed. I called from mall security - even though the store was still doing their closing, no one would even answer the phone. Security finally called the store assistant manager and he was 10 minutes toward home and would not turn around and said he could not break security by entering after hours. He called the store and no one could find the keys.

I took a $20 cab ride to my house.

I broke into my house by breaking a small window, and squeezing in. It was easy. I went back to the store on Monday and the keys were right at the register.

I used to work at Saks and it took 3O minutes or more to close the registers and store after the 9:00 closing time.
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: PeterB
Date: March 31, 2006 11:36PM
deco, the fake rocks are great... remember it's not so much a question of "fooling" anyone as that, since it looks like a rock, you can put it pretty much anywhere. You could put it among a group of rocks or in a garden, for example-- or put it somewhere where you know where to look, but nobody else would think to look there. As they say, the best place to hide a tree is in a forest.




Freya says, 'Hello from NOLA, baby!' (Laissez bon temps rouler!)



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/31/2006 11:37PM by PeterB.
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Re: Son of a B_tch, I locked myself out of the house....
Posted by: ka jowct
Date: March 31, 2006 11:44PM
I locked myself out of my first apartment in NYC once. It had one of those evil doors that can lock without you turning a key to make it happen. I took a bag of garbage out into the hall and the door shut behind me. I had no money, no keys, no jacket, and I couldn't see much because I had taken out my contact lenses to soak them for a few minutes in cleaning solution. Fortunately I had a roommate who could let me back in, but she didn't come home for four hours.

That was a fun evening.
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