I remember hearing horror stories of iphone software update making iphone 3g painfully slow so i had told my wife not to upgrade her iphone 3g. She wants to use some apps that need the updates, is it safe to update it now?

I have a 3G updated to 4.21. Sorry I did.
I'm now investigating how to roll back.
ATT has sucked from the beginning, but the 3G can't handle all the excess of iOS changes for my money. Apps that used to open very fast are now 15 to 30 secs to open and crash.
That's with a regular weekly warm restart.
Others I know feel the same.

I'm holding out for iPho 5 (if it comes no later than Sept) as a dual GSM/CDMA with VzW or I'll switch to a Droid on T-Mo which a few of my fellow NYers are having a better time with.
But the 3G is primitive at best by todays standards.

Yes, an iPhone on 3.1.3 is very fast. Upgrading to iOS 4 is painfully slow.

don't do it. Apple should never have offered it for the 3G. I think that it may have been a ploy to force people to update their hardware. My phone has been almost useless since the update to iPOS 4. It will go through periods where it starts working well randomly, then it starts to get slow again for no apparent reason. The battery will shift from lasting 2 days to 3 hours. It generally sucks. On an iPhone 4 it rocks though.

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MacResource User Map: [www.zeemaps.com]#

found this that I will go at when I have time.

[www.redmondpie.com]

I chose not to upgrade. Most reports have not been favorable. With jailbreak, I have folders and backgrounding, the two features that I would have upgraded for.

When iPhone 5 comes out, I will look for an iPhone 4 that I can unlock.