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guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: pbarra1
Date: April 26, 2012 06:04PM
He said he would stop calling but I would like to find out how old he is. I know the verizon cell number - anyway to get the info for free?
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: Black
Date: April 26, 2012 06:08PM
Cell phone numbers are hard to trace-- law enforcement is your only option unless you get lucky and this person has posted their number online with other identifying info.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: sekker
Date: April 26, 2012 06:09PM
Creepy. Good luck!
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: pbarra1
Date: April 26, 2012 06:10PM
the police advised that we call him and tell him to stop calling which he seemed happy to comply with (my wife called him) but I wonder how old he was.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: Black
Date: April 26, 2012 06:24PM
The only way to find out is if he calls again and your local PD is willing to help you take it to the next level. Hopefully you don't want to know that badly.
Otherwise, we have a few regs here who could whip you up a clever scheme to trick the info out of this guy . . . jimmypoo, you out there?
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: pbarra1
Date: April 26, 2012 06:28PM
My daughter claimed she was 17 when he asked so I dont just blame him and we will talk with her but I was curious if he was a 35 year old guy. He did also ask her to send a pix of her license so maybe he was trying for some due diligence or for some other nefarious purpose.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/26/2012 06:29PM by pbarra1.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: space-time
Date: April 26, 2012 06:32PM
sounds like one of those undercover episodes on TV. watch out
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: Black
Date: April 26, 2012 06:36PM
Quote
space-time
sounds like one of those undercover episodes on TV. watch out

It's OK, the child molester pretty much always gets killed at the end, right?
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: lazydays
Date: April 26, 2012 06:58PM
So your daughter has been talking to him but doesn't know who he is? Not being difficult. I have a 12 year old daughter and I know they are hell on wheels. Just sounds weird that she would talk to a complete stranger. I suppose you and I are doing it right now...
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: hal
Date: April 26, 2012 07:04PM
Are you SURE that he isn't a 13yo boy that has the number because the daughter gave it to him?

Sounds like you haven't talked to the daughter yet - I'd start there before sharpening your pitchfork...
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: Lemon Drop
Date: April 26, 2012 07:09PM
Quote
pbarra1
He said he would stop calling but I would like to find out how old he is. I know the verizon cell number - anyway to get the info for free?

I don't know about for free - but it's pretty easy to trace cell phone owners for just a few dollars, assuming the person has service registered in his name. Google "reverse cell phone number look up" or something like that, whitepages.com has the service.

For no charge you can at least find out where the service is based.

If I were the parent I would confiscate the daughter's phone and not give her another one until she's older and has a better understanding of the dangers of sharing personal info with strangers.
It's not that the guy somehow got her number, that happens, it's the way she reacted that causes concern. Good thing you found out about it when you did.
Make sure she understands the same about facebook, etc.
Good info here.
[www.fbi.gov]
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: Blankity Blank
Date: April 26, 2012 07:29PM
Quote
pbarra1
My daughter claimed she was 17 when he asked so I dont just blame him and we will talk with her but I was curious if he was a 35 year old guy. He did also ask her to send a pix of her license so maybe he was trying for some due diligence or for some other nefarious purpose.
This is a big red flag to me.

Asking for a picture of a license potentially has a lot of things wrong with it.

- A BIG invasion of privacy really early in a relationship.
- A picture, description, address and the license number all in one shot.
- Asking for it shows that he came into contact with her somewhere
that wasn't face to face and where he at leasts suspects underage girls can be
contacted.
- Asking for something that personal and revealing so soon also has an aspect to it that is
too close to starting to try to exert control or coercion in a kind of passive aggressive or subtle way for my comfort level.

Now, a lot of that is just letting my 'it's my kid, so damn right I'm going to be a little paranoid' side run free, but those are the things I'd be ticking off to see how far I'd want to go in checking this guy out. Some if it I might well dismiss as a little over the top.

But as others have said, the most important thing is talking this over with your daughter and making sure she knows how to stay safe, draw appropriate boundaries and that she can always, always run anything that feels uncomfortable past one of you two.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: jdc
Date: April 26, 2012 08:57PM
ok, maybe not the most appropriate, but I thought it was funny

And I got 2 daughters, so stuff like this makes me cringe.





Edited 999 time(s). Last edit at 12:08PM by jdc.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/26/2012 09:00PM by jdc.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: pbarra1
Date: April 26, 2012 08:58PM
No, I agree with you Blank. I was out teaching my class and my wife had the initial talk with my daughter. We will follow up together tomorrow night. Daughter claims that she was trying to call one of her friends and mistakenly dialed this guys number and it started from there. Don't know if I believe that but I will compare the numbers and see if its possible.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: pbarra1
Date: April 26, 2012 08:58PM
good stuff JDC - funny
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: cbelt3
Date: April 26, 2012 09:00PM
I agree with your approach... verify and test. It all may have been some innocent stuff, or not. A good talk with the daughter on safety is usually important. But yeah.. 12 year old ? Hormones absorb 1,000 % their weight in brain cells.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: N-OS X-tasy!
Date: April 26, 2012 09:04PM
A teen boy would not have asked her to send her license. That is serious predator behavior from someone who knows how easy it is to manipulate teens to do stupid things. You would be wise to treat this very seriously.



It is what it is.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: decay
Date: April 26, 2012 09:47PM



our daughter is 12 and she'd like to have a cell phone.


um, no.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: PeterB
Date: April 26, 2012 10:13PM
Quote
N-OS X-tasy!
A teen boy would not have asked her to send her license. That is serious predator behavior from someone who knows how easy it is to manipulate teens to do stupid things. You would be wise to treat this very seriously.

Agreed, and the cell phone makes it just WAY too easy for 12-year olds to do whatever they like, without parental supervision or knowledge. Let them whine, or for emergencies, give them a cell that only allows calls and no text or internet.




Freya says, 'Hello from NOLA, baby!' (Laissez bon temps rouler!)
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: Black
Date: April 26, 2012 11:40PM
Quote
N-OS X-tasy!
A teen boy would not have asked her to send her license. That is serious predator behavior from someone who knows how easy it is to manipulate teens to do stupid things. You would be wise to treat this very seriously.

Sounds to me more like someone trying to verify she was 18, which is what it would seem she would have been claiming if that's the case.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: Speedy
Date: April 27, 2012 01:18AM
Quote
Black
. . jimmypoo, you out there?

Hmmm. I wouldn't want jimmypoo anywhere near my daughter.



Saint Cloud, Minnesota, where the weather is wonderful even when it isn't.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: haikuman
Date: April 27, 2012 02:42AM
The first thing to do is send this guy a photo of your Gun Collection.
Next is the text. """I love my daughter and I love my Guns"""

N OS-X has given you good advice. Be proactive and take this seriously.

Do not wait for a sale on ammunition *(:>*
Rudie



“Stay Hungry Stay Foolish"
Steve Jobs

"There are only two mantras yum and yuk mine is yum "
Bernard Mickey Wrangle<>Tom Robbins<> "Still Life With Woodpecker"

"There is a fine line between a rut and a groove"
G.D. Kittredge III

"


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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: bazookaman
Date: April 27, 2012 08:17AM




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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: billb
Date: April 27, 2012 08:21AM
Quote
N-OS X-tasy!
A teen boy would not have asked her to send her license. That is serious predator behavior from someone who knows how easy it is to manipulate teens to do stupid things. You would be wise to treat this very seriously.

Or a college kid being very careful not to get involved with a 15 year old trying to impress her friends with her " maturity".
I'd be worried about a preadtor first, though, especially these days when you hear about it so often.


As far as getting the phone info for free, know anyone who worked as a cold calling telemarketer ?
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: comaplate
Date: April 27, 2012 12:13PM
If your daughter's school has a School Resource Officer (SRO - i.e. a cop who works in the schools), they would be an excellent resource to contact.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/27/2012 12:14PM by comaplate.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: N-OS X-tasy!
Date: April 27, 2012 01:11PM
Quote
billb
Quote
N-OS X-tasy!
A teen boy would not have asked her to send her license. That is serious predator behavior from someone who knows how easy it is to manipulate teens to do stupid things. You would be wise to treat this very seriously.

Or a college kid being very careful not to get involved with a 15 year old trying to impress her friends with her " maturity".

She's 12, not 15. Big difference. Even bigger difference between 12 and 18.

This is the work of a predator. Treat it as such.



It is what it is.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: JoeH
Date: April 27, 2012 01:39PM
Quote
N-OS X-tasy!
Quote
billb
Quote
N-OS X-tasy!
A teen boy would not have asked her to send her license. That is serious predator behavior from someone who knows how easy it is to manipulate teens to do stupid things. You would be wise to treat this very seriously.

Or a college kid being very careful not to get involved with a 15 year old trying to impress her friends with her " maturity".

She's 12, not 15. Big difference. Even bigger difference between 12 and 18.

This is the work of a predator. Treat it as such.

Re-read where it is explained that she claimed to be 17. Not an unusual claim by a 15 year old, and some college age guys are careful not to get into that kind of situation. Now, if the guy calls again after being informed of the actual age, then you can start thinking predator.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: N-OS X-tasy!
Date: April 27, 2012 02:40PM
She's not 15 - she's 12! Please re-read the thread title.

I understand she claimed to be 17. Seventeen is close enough to 18 that most teen boys wouldn't ask for verification.

Bottom line: A strange man has asked his 12 year old daughter to forward personal information. He should not take this lightly and, in fact, should assume the worst.



It is what it is.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: JoeH
Date: April 27, 2012 03:46PM
So the guy knows that now, but before he had some girl claiming to be 17. It isn't the closeness to 18, it is whether that claim of 17 is correct. College age guys know about 15 year olds adding years to appear more mature, getting into any relation with one is what most try to avoid.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: prymsnap
Date: April 27, 2012 09:22PM
I don't have kids. Honestly, I cannot imagine how parents today can sleep at all. My hat is off to all of you brave and devoted moms and dads.
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Re: guy calling my 12 year old daughter
Posted by: trisho.
Date: April 28, 2012 02:07AM
Don't forget to worry about your 12 year old boys too, folks. They can be victims too, remember.



trisho.
----------------
Official Card-Carrying Mother Earthin' Sl*t.
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