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It's Friday? Friday Funnies
Posted by: pRICE cUBE
Date: September 25, 2020 10:19AM






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Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/25/2020 10:34AM by pRICE cUBE.
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Re: It's Friday? Friday Funnies
Posted by: pRICE cUBE
Date: September 25, 2020 10:43AM




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Re: It's Friday? Friday Funnies
Posted by: Rick-o
Date: September 25, 2020 11:10AM
Three women are in a gym locker room dressing up to play racquetball when suddenly a guy runs through the room wearing nothing but a bag over his head.

He passes the first woman, who looks down at his penis. "He's not my husband," she says.

He passes by the second woman, who also looks down at his penis. "He's not my husband either."

He passes by the third woman, who also looks down as he runs by her.

"Wait a minute," she says. "He's not even a member of this club!"



Mr. Lahey: A lot of people, don’t know how to drink. They drink against the grain of the liquor. And when you drink against the grain of the liquor? You lose.

Randy: What the @#$%& are you talking about?
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Re: It's Friday? Friday Funnies
Posted by: neophyte
Date: September 25, 2020 11:13AM
A man buys a parrot and brings him home. But the parrot starts insulting him and gets really nasty, so the man picks up the parrot and tosses him into the freezer to teach him a lesson. He hears the bird squawking for a few minutes, but all of a sudden the parrot is quiet. The man opens the freezer door, the parrot walks out, looks up at him and says, "I apologize for offending you, and I humbly ask your forgiveness."

The man says, "Well, thank you. I forgive you."

The parrot then says, "If you don't mind my asking, what did the chicken do?"
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Re: It's Friday? Friday Funnies
Posted by: Grateful11
Date: September 25, 2020 11:26AM




Grateful11
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Re: It's Friday? Friday Funnies
Posted by: pRICE cUBE
Date: September 25, 2020 11:52AM







Ways to improve web conference image and sound quality. [forums.macresource.com]


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Re: It's Friday? Friday Funnies
Posted by: pRICE cUBE
Date: September 25, 2020 12:36PM
When I was ten my Mom told me to take my brother to a movie so she could set up for his surprise birthday party
That’s when I realized he was the favorite twin, not me.






A business reporter interviewed some people about what shampoo brand they used.
To his surprise, all 10/10 of them use "GET OUT OF MY BATHROOM"!



3 guys all died on the same day, and they're standing in line before Peter and the pearly gates.

Peter says "ayy fellas, I'm a little full today. I tell you what. Whichever one of you has the best death story gets in today."

So ol' Pete pulls the first guy over and asks how he dies.

The first guy says "I work 80 hour weeks for this construction company so I can afford this sweet high rise apartment on the 80th floor for my wife and I. One day I decides to take off work early and surprise her with flowers and chocolate. Well, when I opened the door I saw a guys shirt on the floor and my wife was in the shower. I was pissed man, I was looking all over the place for this guy. Finally, after tearing my house apart I was leaning over the sink. It's got one of those windows that you can look down from, and all of a sudden, I see this @#$%&' guy, hanging from the window sill! I pound on his fingers and he falls. But get this, he lands on this awning on like the 40th floor. So I start throwing @#$%& out the window, and I finally pushed the fridge out the window and crushed him. Right then, I had a heart attack and died.

Peter says "wow, that's @#$%& crazy dude. Let's hear the next one." As he grabs the second guy.

The second says "so I'm a window washer for this sweet high rise apartment. I was up washing the windows on the 97th floor when my harness broke, and I fell. I thought I was dead man, but by the grace of God I grabbed this window sill when that crazy son of a bitch over there made me fall! I thought for sure I was a goner this time, but I landed on this awning on like the 40th floor. All of a sudden, this fridge came out of nowhere and crushed me to death."

Peter says "this is starting to get really interesting" and grabs the third guy.

The third guy says "so I was minding my own business hiding in this fridge..."



Ways to improve web conference image and sound quality. [forums.macresource.com]






Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/25/2020 12:40PM by pRICE cUBE.
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Re: It's Friday? Friday Funnies
Posted by: Filliam H. Muffman
Date: September 25, 2020 01:15PM




In tha 360. MRF User Map
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Re: It's Friday? Friday Funnies
Posted by: fromish
Date: September 25, 2020 06:06PM
An Elementary School Teacher had twenty-six students in her class. She presented each child in her classroom the 1st half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb.

1 Don't change horses……until they stop running.
2 Strike while ……the bug is close.
3 It's always darkest ……before daylight saving time.
4 Never underestimate ……the power of termites.
5 You can lead a horse to water but…… how?
6 Don't bite the hand that ……looks dirty.
7 No news is ……impossible.
8 A miss is as good as a ……mr.
9 You can't teach an old dog ……new math.
10 If you lie down with dogs, ……you'll stink in the morning.
11 Love all, ……trust me.
12 The pen is mightier ……than the pigs.
13 An idle mind is the ……best way to relax.
14 Where there's smoke there's ……pollution.
15 Happy the bride who ……gets all the presents.
16 A penny saved is ……not much.
17 Two's company, three's…… the Musketeers.
18 Don't put off till tomorrow ……what you put on to go to bed.
19 Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, ……cry and you have to blow your nose.
20 There are none so blind as ……Stevie Wonder.
21 Children should be seen and not ……spanked or grounded.
22 If at first you don't succeed ……get new batteries.
23 You get out of something only what ……you see in the picture on the box.
24 When the blind lead the blind ……get out of the way.
25 A bird in the hand ……is going to poop on you.
26 Better late than ……pregnant.
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