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Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: wurm
Date: May 07, 2007 08:06PM
Yeah, I admit it. I occasionally read Dear Abby.

DEAR ABBY: Please help me to warn your readers about an alarming trend happening in the teenage community: prom babies. I first heard about it while driving my teenage daughter to a lacrosse meet with several of her girlfriends. One girl in the car, "Carrie," said she hoped this year she could have a prom baby. The girls were discussing two former classmates from last year's lacrosse team who had been unable to begin college because they had both become mothers at 17.
Both had deliberately planned to get pregnant on prom night — hence the term "prom baby." Abby, both of the girls were studious and hardworking, with bright futures ahead of them. One had been accepted to several Ivy League schools. Needless to say, their parents were devastated, and many adjustments had to be made for the new babies.
My daughter later told me that other friends were considering trying to get pregnant near prom time so they, too, wouldn't have to deal with the pressures of going to college. Apparently, parents are less strict about their children's whereabouts on prom night and let their teens spend the night in a hotel or at sleepovers.
I thought this sad trend might be local to our area, but during a class reunion in California I learned the trend may be nationwide. One of my oldest friends, "Dana," confided during the reunion that she had become a grandmother at 43 due to her daughter having a prom baby.
As prom night approaches, please warn parents to talk with their children about the responsibilities of premarital sex and the dangers of a prom baby. — Worried Dad in Alpharetta, Ga.

DEAR WORRIED DAD: Your letter was news to me. That a girl headed for an Ivy League college could be so immature that she'd get pregnant so she wouldn't have to go makes me wonder if she was college material in the first place.
In addition to advising parents to talk to their kids about premarital sex, they should be reminded about how important it is that their daughters be able to communicate with them.
The individuals who should be warned are the young men who will be escorting those young women on prom night. One foolish mistake could lead to a 20-year commitment to support a child. And all because their prom dates were afraid to tell their parents that they weren't ready for college? I'm appalled.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: AlphaDog
Date: May 07, 2007 08:14PM
Nope. You just shocked me. Part of me doesn't blame kids for not wanting to get out in this rat race, though. sad smiley

A question for those of you with kids still in school: Do any of the schools still do the project with the egg? I can't remember what class it was, but a number of years ago this was a very popular way for teenagers to get some experience in the 24/7 responsibility of caring for an infant. I have no idea at all how effective it was, although I did talk to some kids who felt it was a very valuable lesson.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: Phy
Date: May 07, 2007 08:15PM
Hmmmm, I checked snopes.com and they had nothing on the "prom baby" phenomenon.

I'd worry about the parental and family pressures that lead girls to take such drastic steps... and I agree that the boys who recklessly (or unknowingly) impregnate these girls do not have any idea what the real consequences are.

I cannot really consider them young men and young women-- with such short-sightedness, they are still children!



"Out of the quarrel with others we make rhetoric; out of the quarrel with ourselves we make poetry." -William Butler Yeats
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: wurm
Date: May 07, 2007 08:20PM
Yeah, Phy. I checked snopes before I posted it. smiling smiley
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: cbelt3
Date: May 07, 2007 08:23PM
I do fondly winking smiley recall the losing virginity at the prom thing. But getting pregnant was something to be avoided. Big time. Even to the point of daring to ask the pharmacist to sell you some of those things in the foil packages.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: cbelt3
Date: May 07, 2007 08:26PM
Dear abby, dear abby...
Well I never thought
That me and my girlfriend would ever get caught
We were sitting in the back seat just shooting the breeze
With her hair up in curlers and her pants to her knees
Signed just married
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: Silencio
Date: May 07, 2007 08:34PM
I guess it doesn't surprise me much to read about this. A surprisingly large swath of teenagers/young adults has gone full-blown reactionary in their attitudes towards sex and relationships. A lot of boys are misogynistic to a degree that is just shocking to me, and I see the girls totally buying into it -- glorifying getting pregnant at 17 is just another symptom.

Jeez, look at me -- 36 years old and already crotchety. sad smiley
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: spearmint
Date: May 07, 2007 08:34PM
College pressure? Just don't go. Mickey D's and Walmart are waiting. Babies are not toys to facilitate life change. Sickening if true.

Going to college and grad school was among the best parts of my life.




Da Good Life
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: lafinfil
Date: May 07, 2007 08:37PM
LOL cbelt3 !

John Prine was the first thing that came to my mind too (he always does)

: -D



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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: rgG
Date: May 07, 2007 08:44PM
I read that today in the paper and was shocked, since I live in Alpharetta where the writer lives. I asked my daughter who is in high school and she hadn't heard of such a thing either. She had of course heard of lots of people having sex after prom, but thought that everyone she knew would be trying to avoid getting pregnant not the opposite.





Roswell, GA (Atlanta suburb)
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: Seacrest
Date: May 07, 2007 08:45PM
I was a prom baby, you insensitive clods!!!
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: rgG
Date: May 07, 2007 08:52PM
Quote
Seacrest
I was a prom baby, you insensitive clods!!!

Wow, that explains sooooo much. smiling smiley





Roswell, GA (Atlanta suburb)
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: Mike Sellers
Date: May 07, 2007 08:53PM
I also live in Alpharetta and have heard nothing about this. The fact that the girls were discussing this while riding in the car with a parent (and a father, no less) makes the entire story suspect. Maybe Penthouse rejected the steamier version of the letter.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/07/2007 08:53PM by Mike Sellers.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: tronnei
Date: May 07, 2007 09:04PM
Sounds like the epidemic of "rainbow parties" that I heard about in my community a couple of years ago.

I didn't believe that either.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: morlock
Date: May 07, 2007 09:12PM
Quote
spearmint
College pressure? Just don't go. Mickey D's and Walmart are waiting. ...

The world needs ditchdiggers, too"
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: Filliam H. Muffman
Date: May 07, 2007 09:29PM
Georgia has some pretty twisted suburbs. I would believe just about anything there after seeing this Frontline show.
[www.pbs.org]



In tha 360. MRF User Map
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: bfd
Date: May 07, 2007 09:29PM
Quote
AlphaDog
A question for those of you with kids still in school: Do any of the schools still do the project with the egg? I can't remember what class it was, but a number of years ago this was a very popular way for teenagers to get some experience in the 24/7 responsibility of caring for an infant. I have no idea at all how effective it was, although I did talk to some kids who felt it was a very valuable lesson.

Yeah, but now it's a potato. Probably didn't take too many broken eggs for the schools to make that decision …
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: Silencio
Date: May 07, 2007 09:35PM
Quote
bfd
Yeah, but now it's a potato. Probably didn't take too many broken eggs for the schools to make that decision …

Can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs. But I guess that school now has to settle for a side order of hash browns.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: Mike Sellers
Date: May 07, 2007 09:45PM
Quote
Filliam H. Muffman
Georgia has some pretty twisted suburbs. I would believe just about anything there after seeing this Frontline show.
[www.pbs.org]

Teenagers with too little parental supervision engaging in misguided and dangerous behavior isn't just restricted to Rockdale County, Georgia. It was the luck of the draw that they got singled out.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: ArtP
Date: May 07, 2007 09:46PM
Back when I was in High School (over 25 years ago), sex on Prom Night was assumed by most of the "cool kids" BUT that was protected sex.

I actually forgot the condoms in my nervous preparation for Prom and had to make a Store run after checking into the Hyatt Regency (this was when 7-11's actually closed at 11 and gas stations rarely carried condoms).

I, being Male, fully understand the need for "sex before marraige" but I will never understand the fascination with having a kid before you are financially or mentally ready.

I live in a city where there are tons of single mothers of ALL ages and the Men REALLY catch it now when it comes to "Back child support". Delinquent Men will move from job to job to stay a step ahead of child support agencies. I recently found out that the Child Support agencies now take Income Tax Refunds, and if you refinance your Home they will take that money also.

Imagine being declared the father of a child at 18 when your life is just starting. From what I have heard, even those who try and do the right thing from the start have the odds against them.

Young men (hopefully) know this and should take EVERY precaution against unwanted pregnancy. I guess some of the young women feel it may be okay to have the baby because they will be taken care of.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: DavidS
Date: May 07, 2007 10:18PM
I was wondering if rgG was going to chime in, since she is the mother of an Alpharetta teenager. Thanks for not letting me down.

Sex on prom night - an age-old tradition. Getting her pregnant? I can't imagine any guy being interested in that.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: $tevie
Date: May 07, 2007 10:27PM
Quote
cbelt3
Dear abby, dear abby...
Well I never thought
That me and my girlfriend would ever get caught
We were sitting in the back seat just shooting the breeze
With her hair up in curlers and her pants to her knees
Signed just married

For some reason that popped into my head a couple of weeks ago and I used it as my sig here for a week or two.



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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: kj
Date: May 07, 2007 10:33PM
>>>Yeah, but now it's a potato. Probably didn't take too many broken eggs for the schools to make that decision …

It was a sack of sugar when I was in high school. The middle school my son will be going to has full blown mechanical "babies" that are programmed to cry, etc, etc. The class where they hand them out is a popular elective, for some odd reason. kj.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: incognegro
Date: May 07, 2007 10:35PM
ugh. trophy kids. unprepared moms who are themselves children.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: Mike Johnson
Date: May 07, 2007 11:19PM
My sister got pregnant at her prom. She was raped by her date.

Of course we should talk to our kids and do what we can to prevent them from having unsafe sex, and prom night is a biggie. But I also wish we talked more about rape on prom night. Do some girls hope for a prom baby so they won't have to go to college? Maybe. Do some guys rape their prom dates? Yes.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/07/2007 11:20PM by Mike Johnson.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: chas_m
Date: May 07, 2007 11:57PM
This is pure BS and the woman who took over Dear Abby should be ashamed of herself for printing it. More diversionary "news" to keep our minds off the REAL news.



chas_m




[crawlingfromtheusa.blogspot.com] <-- Moving to Canada blog
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: RgrF
Date: May 08, 2007 12:28AM
Three (3) posters from Alpharetta, Georgia, what are the odds? Cable and satellite TV hasn't made it there yet huh?
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: trisho.
Date: May 08, 2007 06:42AM
I honestly wouldn't be surprised if this were true. It seems like a lot of kids (not most) are not too concerned with protection during sex. If you mix that careless with prom and a high level of expectancy, there you go. To get even more off, some of the girls and boys probably think they're parents will automatically help take care of the new babies or that their parents deserve to be saddled with it after pressuring them so much. Yes, it's immaturity and vindictiveness rolled into a big bag of WTF. But sometimes kids and even older adults don't want to disappoint people in one way and feel desperate so an alternate is to disappoint in another way that could be possibly blamed on someone else. Or suicide.

Another element that makes this seem true to me is recent commercial campaign where it shows poor quality home videos (staged - YouTube aesthetic) of boys having fun. At the end a teenage boy says, "Why mess up your life with a pregnancy?" and the logo and campaign url flash on the screen.

Found it: http://www.stayteen.org/. He says, "This is my life. I’m not going to mess it up with a pregnancy."

What's weird is the two ads I've seen so far seem much more geared towards boys and rather misogynistic. It almost has a subtext of "Don't mess your life with a pregnancy! Force your girlfriend to have an abortion or push her down the stairs!" I'm pro-choice but even these ads felt really weird to me.



trisho.
----------------
Official Card-Carrying Mother Earthin' Sl*t.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: Lux Interior
Date: May 08, 2007 07:37AM
Quote
morlock
Quote
spearmint
College pressure? Just don't go. Mickey D's and Walmart are waiting. ...

The world needs ditchdiggers, too"

"How would you like to come over and... Mow my lawn! Hmm? Hmm? Hmm?"

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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: Jimmypoo
Date: May 08, 2007 08:42AM
Quote
rgG
I asked my daughter who is in high school and she hadn't heard of such a thing either.

If you haven't heard about high school, and SHE hasn't heard about high school or
know anyone who is in high school, that would explain many things with regard
to your posts that I've seen here over the years.

Do Georgia authorities know that you have a teen daughter that isn't even aware
of high school - and has been truant the past, oh...... 3600 days of school?

No wonder Georgia always ranks between 45th and 50th!!!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/08/2007 08:46AM by Jimmypoo.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: kap
Date: May 08, 2007 09:58AM
Quote
Jimmypoo

No wonder Georgia always ranks between 45th and 50th!!!

Still better than CA. Our state ranks 49th out of 50th!



SoCal for now.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: SteveO
Date: May 08, 2007 10:32AM
Lux, nice use of Ted! LMAO.

I read somewhere that the teenage brain does not have a fully developed center of reasoning/logic. That is why there are "stupid" decisions like this and also why while it sounds farfetched, it's also entirely credible. WE as ADULTS think it's a totally ridiculous idea to get pregnant at prom...b/c we have the maturity/reasoning to think out consequences. But kids aren't always able to put 2 and 2 together as it were.

Mike Johnson, I am so sorry your sister was raped. You and your family have my sympathies. And you are right, the whole gamut of sex, from consensual to rape, needs to be talked about among parent and child.
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: rgG
Date: May 08, 2007 12:14PM
It looks elmo3 is now posting using jimmpoo's nick. Yes, elmo/poo, there should have been two commas offsetting the phrase, "who is in high school," in my response. grinning smiley





Roswell, GA (Atlanta suburb)
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: D-Rod
Date: May 08, 2007 02:05PM
Jimmypoo, you crack me up!!!!!! I missed you.

Dennis R



Formerly known as Dennis R
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Re: Am I the only one unaware of the supposed "prom baby" trend?
Posted by: Jimmypoo
Date: May 08, 2007 04:01PM
Dennis,

I missed you too!

What are you doing tonight? Racer X is doing something with his "wife" - so my schedule is now open.

winking smiley



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/08/2007 04:02PM by Jimmypoo.
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