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Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: dmann
Date: January 07, 2009 12:15PM
deckeda's follow up post reminded me of karsen's search for Christmas presents for his daughter.

Did she like them???

DM
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Re: Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: karsen
Date: January 07, 2009 12:30PM
Thanks for checking in.

She said she liked them, so I take it she did though I don't know for certain. It seems dad isn't held in very high regard right now. It's lovely having a 13 (soon to be 14 year old) daughter who knows everything!

Besides that, I got trumped by her mother, who got her a Wii, Wii Fit and Guitar Hero. I can't compete with that.

banghead smiley

Oh well... I liked them. And I appreciate everyone's input here in helping me pick them out. I still plan on getting her the calligraphy set for her birthday next month.



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Re: Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: The UnDoug
Date: January 07, 2009 12:59PM
Hey, man....your kid will have to love you for who you are, ultimately. It may take her a while to get there, but hopefully she eventually will. And it won't be because you bought her great @#$%&, it'll be because you are her dad, no matter what!



[www.zeemaps.com]
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Re: Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: Paul F.
Date: January 07, 2009 01:32PM
Hey Karsen;

If you get that one set I linked to, let me know what kind of quality it is...
I have crappy penmanship, but I'm thinking that set would be cool to have anyway... so I'm thinking about it.



Paul F.
-----
A sword never kills anybody; it is a tool in the killer's hand. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca c. 5 BC - 65 AD
----
Good is the enemy of Excellent. Talent is not necessary for Excellence.
Persistence is necessary for Excellence. And Persistence is a Decision.

--

--

--
Eureka, CA
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Re: Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: karsen
Date: January 07, 2009 01:48PM
Quote
The UnDoug
Hey, man....your kid will have to love you for who you are, ultimately. It may take her a while to get there, but hopefully she eventually will. And it won't be because you bought her great @#$%&, it'll be because you are her dad, no matter what!

Ultimately yes. But it will likely take many years before she comes around. Right now she's got a new daddy and all sorts of high prized bribes to keep her happy up there.



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Re: Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: mrbigstuff
Date: January 07, 2009 01:57PM
Hey, Karsen, don't feel down. What UnDoug said seems to bear out. The smart, quiet ones are always underappreciated at first but always look cool in the end, just like the Hollywood movies!
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Re: Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: karsen
Date: January 07, 2009 02:07PM
Thanks all, It's easy to say to not feel down. But it's hard not to. Since she moved up north I've had her come down here for the full summer, every summer. This year however, she's already setting me up to not visit this summer. What hurts most is she has a young sister down here that thinks the world of her and really wants to spend time with her older sister. It stings.



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Re: Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: Paul F.
Date: January 07, 2009 02:22PM
Quote

Right now she's got a new daddy and all sorts of high prized bribes to keep her happy up there.

Wrong.
She's only got ONE daddy. You.
She may forget it for a while (teenage years), but it's ALWAYS going to be you.

Doesn't mean you can't feel bummed when new-guy buys her off (even though neither of them is probably thinking of it in quite those terms).



Paul F.
-----
A sword never kills anybody; it is a tool in the killer's hand. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca c. 5 BC - 65 AD
----
Good is the enemy of Excellent. Talent is not necessary for Excellence.
Persistence is necessary for Excellence. And Persistence is a Decision.

--

--

--
Eureka, CA
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Re: Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: cyclemax
Date: January 07, 2009 03:19PM
I don't know all the details of your situation, but I have a friend who re-married a rich doctor. Her then fourteen year old daughter got sucked into having her affection bought buy her step-dad. It didn't last very long. Turns out she hated the guy, but the allure of the new laptop, and big screen TV in her room was stronger than her dislike... to a point. Hang in there, she'll come back.
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Re: Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: dmann
Date: January 07, 2009 07:02PM
I'm so sorry you are going through a rough patch with your daughter. Just keep doing what you can to reach her- gifts, cards, whatever. No matter what she says or how badly she may behave, don't break contact. Girls are hard (I know, I am one!).

I know that I probably seemed like an alien to my dad when I was a teenager. He didn't live far away, but my parents were divorced and at times, I think he may have thought I preferred my stepdad over him. (It most definitely wasn't the case.)

Hang in there-
DM
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Re: Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: vision63
Date: January 07, 2009 09:43PM
At least you "want" to be her dad. That beats a ton of kids situations right there. The key is just be consistent and loving. No matter how your kid turns out, she'll never be able to say that her dad wasn't everything a real dad could be under the circumstances. Walk tall.
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Re: Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: karsen
Date: January 07, 2009 11:39PM
I'm pretty resilient, it's tough but I'll be fine. The consensus is she will come around in a few years and everything will pass. I'm bothered most that during the time she's going through this that she and her younger (1/2) sister (who lives with me) are missing out on important bonding. Not much I can do but wait it out and continue to attempt to stay in contact.

I appreciate all of the support. This forum has some great people.



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Re: Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: freeradical
Date: January 08, 2009 12:06AM
If your daughter is interested in calligraphy, I can recommend a great book. Get her a copy of The 26 Letters by Oscar Ogg. It explains the origins of our character set going back to the Phonecians IIRC.

[www.abebooks.com]
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Re: Paging karsen: Did your daughter like her Christmas gifts?
Posted by: karsen
Date: January 08, 2009 12:22AM
Bookmarked, thanks. I'll look in to that one more tomor... er... today! Better get some shut eye.



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