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God helps those who...
Posted by: Seacrest
Date: June 07, 2006 01:26PM
stay the heck out of lion cages.

[msnbc.msn.com]





I am not Ryan Seacrest, and I do not approve this message.
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: Lux Interior
Date: June 07, 2006 01:32PM
Maybe he thought the lion was Aslan.
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: $tevie
Date: June 07, 2006 01:51PM
The man shouted, ‘God will save me, if he exists,’

You know, that's just the sort of wishy-washy remark that pisses God off. "Fine, let the lioness eat you. 'If he exists', my @ss!"



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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: JoeM
Date: June 07, 2006 03:04PM


Lions:1
Knuckleheads:0 (again)



JoeM
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: brofoski
Date: June 07, 2006 03:20PM
Quote
$tevie
The man shouted, ‘God will save me, if he exists,’

You know, that's just the sort of wishy-washy remark that pisses God off. "Fine, let the lioness eat you. 'If he exists', my @ss!"

Exactly. He went into this with the wrong attitude. You have to be a believer, then it would have worked. Really. Try it believers.
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: Dennis S
Date: June 07, 2006 04:06PM
About 20 years ago, there was a lawyer in Louisiana who stood up in a boat and challenged God to strike him with lightning if he existed and he got zapped and killed.
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: billb
Date: June 07, 2006 04:15PM
...another appealling lawyer in hell.

Crystal clear blue sky day, too, I bet. : - )
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: (vikm)
Date: June 07, 2006 04:46PM
Quote
Dennis S
About 20 years ago, there was a lawyer in Louisiana who stood up in a boat and challenged God to strike him with lightning if he existed and he got zapped and killed.

I guess the lion guy just picked the wrong day. He shoulda checked God's hours before assuming he'd save him from the lion. I guess when they say he's always watching and sees everything, they didn't say he'd do @#$%& about it all of the time.
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: Lux Interior
Date: June 07, 2006 05:01PM
Quote
(vikm)
I guess when they say he's always watching and sees everything, they didn't say he'd do @#$%& about it all of the time.

Maybe God has a Tivo.
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: Panopticon
Date: June 07, 2006 05:15PM
Quote
$tevie
The man shouted, ‘God will save me, if he exists,’

You know, that's just the sort of wishy-washy remark that pisses God off. "Fine, let the lioness eat you. 'If he exists', my @ss!"

LOL
$tevie, I thought for sure you would have caught that 'he' pronouncement. Maybe this doofus just proved God's gender eye popping smiley

Quote
Dennis S
About 20 years ago, there was a lawyer in Louisiana who stood up in a boat and challenged God to strike him with lightning if he existed and he got zapped and killed.

...sounds lke the scene in CaddyShack, when "The Bishop" is struck down on the golf course (but doesn't die)!

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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: cbelt3
Date: June 08, 2006 12:01AM
As Mario said it

Fools die.
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: x-uri
Date: June 08, 2006 01:58AM
[www.wsbtv.com]

She said 'Amen' and the room was engulfed in a huge ball of fire. The 65-year-old Brown said she is blessed to be alive.

She finishes her prayer and lightning blows up her kitchen and she says "Thank you sir, may I have another."

[www.msnbc.msn.com]

MEXICO CITY - Five Mexican children were killed when a large metal cross they were praying at was struck by lightning in central Mexico, local media reported Monday.

Which child do you think was secretly thinking "I dare you..."
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: wurm
Date: June 08, 2006 10:30AM
Reminds me of one of my favorites:
-----------------------------------

Jim was a very devout Christian who lived near a river.

One day, the river flooded the town where Jim lived, forcing Jim to climb onto the roof of his house. In a short while, a man in a boat came along and told Jim to climb aboard and be taken to safety.

"No thanks," Jim said. "God will take care of me." The fellow in the boat shrugged & motored off.

In a while the water had risen to where it was just a few inches below where Jim was perched. Along came another boat. "Quick, jump in!" shouted the boatman.

"No, no," replied Jim. "God is going to save me. I must trust in Him." Reluctantly the fellow in the boat departs.

Soon the water was lapping at Jim's feet so he climbed up onto the house's chimney. Then a helicopter came and lowered a ladder. The pilot yelled & frantically signaled for Jim to climb up the ladder & get in.

"Leave me alone!" Jim yelled back, motioning at the pilot to go away. "God is going to save me any minute now."

Suddenly the house shuddered on its foundations, no longer able to resist the river's might surge. In front of the pilot's horrified eyes, the house broke up into so much tinder wood, and Jim disappeared under the raging waters.

Up in heaven, Jim stood before God. "I trusted you to take care of me," Jim said. "How come you let me drown?"

God replied "Well, I sent you two boats and a helicopter. What else did you want?"
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: bernadette
Date: June 08, 2006 12:58PM
Maybe the lion was praying "Please Lord, let me eat him", and the Lord answered HIS prayer.
Proof of Gods existence?
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: incognegro
Date: June 09, 2006 11:31PM
so God is really a Lion... makes purrfect sense, now!
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: x-uri
Date: June 10, 2006 07:40AM
Well, he is a lion up until the very end of The Last Battle -- which is the worst book in the series.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 06/10/2006 07:41AM by x-uri.
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Re: God helps those who...
Posted by: ajakeski
Date: June 11, 2006 01:51PM
nature hard at work.




I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell? -Homer.
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