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Habemus Papam
Posted by: $tevie
Date: March 13, 2013 01:18PM
There's a new Pope. Stay tuned for more exciting updates from the 14th Century.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: decay
Date: March 13, 2013 01:23PM




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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: graylocks
Date: March 13, 2013 01:23PM
Ding, Ding, Ding! We have a winner here!



"Success isn't about how much money you make. It is about the difference you make in people's lives."--Michelle Obama
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Steve G.
Date: March 13, 2013 01:28PM
So I get this phone call from a friend a few minutes ago about a joke told in their Wall Street Office.

"Headline: Pope chosen by God with two-third majority."
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: beagledave
Date: March 13, 2013 01:39PM
Pretty quick....maybe Scola, then?
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: RgrF
Date: March 13, 2013 01:43PM
Hey mambo, mambo Italiano Argentinio...



"Who's more foolish - the fool or the fool that follows him?" - Obi Wan Kenobi



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/13/2013 02:15PM by RgrF.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: decay
Date: March 13, 2013 01:50PM
shamelessly stolen from a friend of mine:

Church Official proclaims “Non tussis, non delector!”, Latin for “If you don’t cough, you don’t get off.”



---
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: GGD
Date: March 13, 2013 01:57PM
Not showing up on Software Update yet.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: $tevie
Date: March 13, 2013 01:59PM
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: beagledave
Date: March 13, 2013 02:02PM
Quote
GGD
Not showing up on Software Update yet.

You have to change your language setting to Latin.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: cbelt3
Date: March 13, 2013 02:04PM
Love CNN's lies and hysteria:

"There are approximately 600 million Catholic women in the world, but none will have a direct say in who the next pope will be."

[www.cnn.com]

Neither will the approximately 600 million Catholic men in the world.

Just the Cardinals.

CNN. Manufacturing controversy in order to sell advertising since 1980

angry villagers smiley
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Manlove
Date: March 13, 2013 02:06PM
And let's hope he will be the last.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: $tevie
Date: March 13, 2013 02:06PM
There's nothing hysterical about pointing out that women are blocked from ever being Cardinals, hence they have no say.



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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: decay
Date: March 13, 2013 02:11PM
Quote
$tevie
There's nothing hysterical about pointing out that women are blocked from ever being Cardinals, hence they have no say.

exactly zero percent of women have a say.

it's all about the men, so sayeth the Bible.



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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: decay
Date: March 13, 2013 02:14PM
more jests...

The white smoke, created by burning the underwear of a twelve-year old altar boy, signals the selection of a new Capo for the Vatican. Upon his installation the Cardinals will gather together once more, which each supplied with a drugged and naked child, that they will ritually molest, kill and consume.

Please pray for Pope Gangnam Rodman I.



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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Janit
Date: March 13, 2013 02:20PM
Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio, Archbishop of Buenos Aires. Let's hope for change.

Pope Francis I.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/13/2013 02:25PM by Janit.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: rgG
Date: March 13, 2013 02:28PM
Supposedly, he was the runner up last time.





Roswell, GA (Atlanta suburb)
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: $tevie
Date: March 13, 2013 02:30PM
Bergoglio is seen an unwaveringly orthodox on matters of sexual morality, staunchly opposing abortion, same-sex marriage, and contraception. In 2010 he asserted that gay adoption is a form of discrimination against children, earning a public rebuke from Argentina's President, Cristina Fernández de Kirchner.

[ncronline.org]
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: cbelt3
Date: March 13, 2013 02:30PM
South America ?

Oog. Tradition !!!!
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: decay
Date: March 13, 2013 02:32PM
News just in: White smoke has been spotted coming from Willie Nelson's tour bus...



---
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: cbelt3
Date: March 13, 2013 02:34PM
Quote
$tevie
There's nothing hysterical about pointing out that women are blocked from ever being Cardinals, hence they have no say.
It is when it says 'women' and does not mention the 600 million men minus 200 some odd cardinals. It implies that all the millions of men in the church get a vote. Which is BS.

Omission as opposed to commission, but it's still a lie.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: hal
Date: March 13, 2013 02:36PM
The Catholic Church:

"What would I do? I'd shut it down and give the money back to the shareholders."
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Black Tea
Date: March 13, 2013 02:36PM
He's Orthodox.

Faithful Catholics will love him.

Cafeteria Catholics probably not so much.

God Bless Pope Francis I!

Going to Mass at 7 to celebrate.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Black Tea
Date: March 13, 2013 02:49PM
Quote
$tevie
Bergoglio is seen an unwaveringly orthodox on matters of sexual morality, staunchly opposing abortion, same-sex marriage, and contraception. In 2010 he asserted that gay adoption is a form of discrimination against children, earning a public rebuke from Argentina's President, Cristina Fernández de Kirchner.

[ncronline.org]

He will also be for feeding the poor, housing the homeless, universal health care, being kind to migrant workers, anti-war, and that every human from conception to natural death is deserving of equal dignity.

Thank you Holy Spirit!
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: RgrF
Date: March 13, 2013 02:51PM
While you're at it say a prayer for all the victims of the Church.



"Who's more foolish - the fool or the fool that follows him?" - Obi Wan Kenobi
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: decay
Date: March 13, 2013 03:10PM
another closed-minded bigot.



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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: rjmacs
Date: March 13, 2013 03:42PM
All Hail Francis, Pope of Cats!



rj
AKA
Vreemac, Moth of the Future
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: $tevie
Date: March 13, 2013 04:12PM


[www.youtube.com]
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Lemon Drop
Date: March 13, 2013 04:22PM
I'm interested to learn more about this man. I do like that he is oriented to social causes rather than theology - however, it doesn't sound as though he will be a person to do any of the modernization that the church so desperately needs.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Black Tea
Date: March 13, 2013 04:24PM
Quote
Lemon Drop
I'm interested to learn more about this man. I do like that he is oriented to social causes rather than theology - however, it doesn't sound as though he will be a person to do any of the modernization that the church so desperately needs.

What modernization does The Bride of Christ need?
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Lemon Drop
Date: March 13, 2013 04:26PM
Quote
Black Tea
Quote
Lemon Drop
I'm interested to learn more about this man. I do like that he is oriented to social causes rather than theology - however, it doesn't sound as though he will be a person to do any of the modernization that the church so desperately needs.

What modernization does The Bride of Christ need?

How about a return to how things were in the early days of the church, before it became a political organization? You know, women participated fully and equally, etc. Everyone's gifts mattered. That would be a start.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/13/2013 04:27PM by Lemon Drop.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: davester
Date: March 13, 2013 04:29PM
They sure seem to be clinging to the old farts these days. Check this out:
(from wikipedia)
Date range Average Age At election
1503 to 1700 63
1700 to 2005 65
1503 to 2005 64



"In science it often happens that scientists say, 'You know that's a really good argument; my position is mistaken,' and then they would actually change their minds and you never hear that old view from them again. They really do it. It doesn't happen as often as it should, because scientists are human and change is sometimes painful. But it happens every day. I cannot recall the last time something like that happened in politics or religion." (1987) -- Carl Sagan
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Steve G.
Date: March 13, 2013 04:34PM
Mistaken Impressions.

As opposed to what many think, the new Pope has not chosen to name himself after St. Francis of Assisi. He is actually had another Francis in mind.



Francis and Francis===> Similarities:
1) Neither was ever formally ordained as a priest.
2) Both have Italian origins.
3) Each has been called 'The Patron Saint of Animals", one for spiritual connections, the other for Mob connections.
4) One erected the first Christmas manger, the other always fixed up his manager for Christmas.
5) One made his mark by swinging a censer, the other once took a swing at a censor.
6) Hopefully all three will live fondly in the hearts of all mankind.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Steve G.
Date: March 13, 2013 04:44PM
BREAKING NEWS!

VATICAN RECEIVES PHONE CALL THAT BENEDICT HAS CHANGED HIS MIND.


Benedict realizes after a couple of weeks of rest that he's not ready to retire and is ready to give it another shot.
He says his main inspiration for a glorious comeback came after reading Walter Isaacson's biography.



For Non-Forum people, please substitute Bret Favre:
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: hal
Date: March 13, 2013 04:48PM
Quote
davester
They sure seem to be clinging to the old farts these days. Check this out:
(from wikipedia)
Date range Average Age At election
1503 to 1700 63
1700 to 2005 65
1503 to 2005 64

Imagine how old 63 was back in 1600... wouldn't that be like 85 today?
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: August West
Date: March 13, 2013 04:50PM
When I think of Argentina, I am forced to think of those exiles I have met and known. Most fled the dirty war, afraid of being disappeared. Is it surprising that a brown shirt pope resigns and a man linked to the disappeared arrives? Sorry to rain on the parade.





Apologies to the anonymous forum member affected by my previous sig pic. It was my personal pic of a country expressing great grief as their leader, one of the most recognized people in the world, lay on his deathbed 8 years ago, days before he died. Like a naif, I did not realize it was offensively political, I considered it an expression of deep emotion and a reminder of the mortal coil's nature; that we all, great and small, can only hope to make a difference in our short time here, no matter the personal cost.

I'll post another pic from my work in South Africa that is, hopefully, apolitical.

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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Steve G.
Date: March 13, 2013 04:52PM
Quote
hal
Quote
davester
They sure seem to be clinging to the old farts these days. Check this out:
(from wikipedia)
Date range Average Age At election
1503 to 1700 63
1700 to 2005 65
1503 to 2005 64

Imagine how old 63 was back in 1600... wouldn't that be like 85 today?

Actually, if you ate your veggies, got lots of exercise and avoided plague houses, you could live past 63 in 1600. The big problem was that everyone you started out with was dead.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: davester
Date: March 13, 2013 05:05PM
Quote
hal
Quote
davester
They sure seem to be clinging to the old farts these days. Check this out:
(from wikipedia)
Date range Average Age At election
1503 to 1700 63
1700 to 2005 65
1503 to 2005 64

Imagine how old 63 was back in 1600... wouldn't that be like 85 today?

Not that different. Low average ages for times gone past are primarily due to high child mortality, starvation and disease from living in unsanitary conditions. We haven't evolved to live longer, it's just that those conditions don't affect as many in modern western societies, just as they didn't affect many rich people (i.e. catholic higher ups) way back when.



"In science it often happens that scientists say, 'You know that's a really good argument; my position is mistaken,' and then they would actually change their minds and you never hear that old view from them again. They really do it. It doesn't happen as often as it should, because scientists are human and change is sometimes painful. But it happens every day. I cannot recall the last time something like that happened in politics or religion." (1987) -- Carl Sagan
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: (vikm)
Date: March 13, 2013 05:22PM
The Catholic Church just can't seem to win with some people.

So what if the guy is old. Does anyone really want to suggest a "youth movement"?
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Manlove
Date: March 13, 2013 05:52PM
[www.youtube.com]
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Steve G.
Date: March 13, 2013 06:07PM
I suggest we now express our approval of others' forum posts graphically.


YEA!!


NEGATIVO
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: J Marston
Date: March 13, 2013 08:25PM
Quote
(vikm)
So what if the guy is old.

It may mean nothing; but it sometimes indicates a college of cardinals that is not sure what direction to take. John Paul II was not yet 60 when elected, and signaled a church that wanted to stop the liturgical innovation but reinforce the outreach of Vatican II. Benedict XVI was nearly 80; Francis I is 76. This sort of bet-hedging by the cardinals is nothing new, and is often on display in times of rapid change.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: Lux Interior
Date: March 13, 2013 09:15PM
Quote
rgG
Supposedly, he was the runner up last time.

I think it was the weak showing in the swimsuit competition that did him in.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: rgG
Date: March 13, 2013 09:59PM
Quote
Lux Interior
Quote
rgG
Supposedly, he was the runner up last time.

I think it was the weak showing in the swimsuit competition that did him in.

Maybe answering that he wanted 'world peace' sealed the deal this time around. smiling smiley





Roswell, GA (Atlanta suburb)
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: the_poochies
Date: March 14, 2013 08:20AM
Little Poochie came home from his Catholic elementary school yesterday and said to me:

Sister got on the loudspeaker and said, 'White smoke has been spotted!'
We all got up from our desks thinking the school was on fire.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: rgG
Date: March 14, 2013 08:43AM
Quote
the_poochies
Little Poochie came home from his Catholic elementary school yesterday and said to me:

Sister got on the loudspeaker and said, 'White smoke has been spotted!'
We all got up from our desks thinking the school was on fire.

ftw smiley





Roswell, GA (Atlanta suburb)
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: lafinfil
Date: March 14, 2013 09:41AM
: -D



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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: kap
Date: March 14, 2013 11:34AM
Quote
Black Tea

Faithful Catholics will love him.

Define "faithful" in the biblical sense then apply it to the 21st century. Will that work? Nope. Let's all return the Golden Day of Gospel ... waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back.



SoCal for now.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: kap
Date: March 14, 2013 11:37AM
Quote
Black Tea

He will also be for feeding the poor, housing the homeless, universal health care, being kind to migrant workers, anti-war, and that every human from conception to natural death is deserving of equal dignity.

Universal Health Care?!! Umm, he is so out of touch with the Tea Party.



SoCal for now.
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Re: Habemus Papam
Posted by: kap
Date: March 14, 2013 11:38AM
Quote
Steve G.
I suggest we now express our approval of others' forum posts graphically.


YEA!!


NEGATIVO

I still prefer the pink smoke ban smiley



SoCal for now.
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